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Benefits of breastfeeding continue through toddlerhood

By: Becky Flora-Waterman, B.S.ed., IBCLC, RLC

Blake Waterman

I usually try to write my column from a purely professional viewpoint with only rare interjections about my own personal experience.

However, I also think it’s important for my patients and readers to know that I have also made this journey called breastfeeding many times myself and am, in fact, on it once again with Blake, my now 2-year-old.

Yes, you read it correctly. Blake is 2, and we are still breastfeeding. I have actually breastfed longer than this with another child and plan to nurse Blake until he weans himself.

Did you know that the average age for self-weaning worldwide is 3 years old? So, I figure we’re not off base by too much!

Unfortunately, the United States falls way behind on recommendations regarding the longevity of breastfeeding that come from medical organizations. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends a minimum of one year breastfeeding and then for as long as mother and child mutually desire to continue.

The World Health Organization recommends a minimum of two years. These recommendations are based on years of studies that show the benefits of long-term breastfeeding to be significant and something to promote for the better health of society as whole.

I tend to get the same types of questions when average people find out that I am nursing a toddler. So I thought I would try to answer them here for you.

Haven’t all the health benefits of breastfeeding been used up by this time? No, study after study has shown that extended breastfeeding is beneficial for both mother and child.

Breastfeeding has a dose effect. That is to say that the more exclusive (nothing but breastmilk) it is until solids are introduced around 6 months of age and the longer in time that it continues, the more substantial the health benefits are and the longer they last.

Other studies have shown better reading skills in boys who were breastfed past age 1 and fewer speech problems and better oral development overall in children nursed until at least the first birthday.

The immunological benefits don’t magically go away either. In fact, the longer a child nurses the more concentrated these components become in mothers’ milk. Toddlers who are still nursing a few times each day experience fewer colds, respiratory illnesses, diarrhea, ear infections, etc., than children who have weaned. The child who has allergies may not consume a good variety of foods until his digestive system can tolerate more. The ill child who is vomiting may not tolerate anything but nursing.

In both cases, breastmilk provides a natural nutritional cushion until the child’s system can take in more food.

How can you still nurse all the time after already doing it this long? In reality, the nursing toddler usually doesn’t nurse all that often. Blake typically nurses once or twice a day. He gave up his night nursings months ago.

However, children are different. A friend of mine who is nursing a girl, age 2, hardly nurses at all during the day but nurses frequently at night. The idea that you nurse a toddler like you do a newborn is a myth.

While children this age still love to nurse and derive great satisfaction and comfort from it, they also have many other interests. They are normal children who are busy with all the things that other children their age are.
But don’t you have older children? What do they think about this? My older children range in age from 12 to 18. Breastfeeding is part of normal life for them. They don’t think much about it at all. It’s just something that Blake and Mom do because it’s a good thing. They did it, and now Blake does it.

I hope that by sharing this part of my mothering with them that my boys will be more apt to encourage and support their future wives to breastfeed and that my girls won’t consider doing anything else.
What does your husband think about you still nursing? Todd is very supportive of it. And that’s a big part of why I still can and do.

Mothers who have a significant other in their lives — husband, mother, sister, friend — who supports their decision to breastfeed and encourages them when it gets a little tough, are more likely to succeed.

I would have done it had he not supported me but it’s nice to know he does. It helps that he’s aware of the many benefits and has seen them benefit his son.
What do other people say about it? Well, to be honest, I don’t worry much about this anymore. I know some moms have to spend a lot of time defending their extended breastfeeding to family and friends, and I have even had to do that myself in the past.

However, I have found that education is empowering to all. Because I know about all the benefits and because I really believe I’m making a difference in my child’s life, it’s easier to ignore the naysayers.

I also have enough confidence in my parenting abilities and decisions not to let them get to me. For moms who continue to struggle with this, though, I often recommend finding a support group of like-minded moms who can encourage and support them in their parenting decisions.
What about teeth? This is also a myth about nursing an older child. Blake has had a mouthful of teeth for a while now. I don’t recall him ever biting me. Of course, some children do try to bite but with some gentle teaching they can be taught that that is not appropriate behavior and the biting ends.
What about nursing in public? Well, we don’t do a lot of this anymore; although, we did when he was an infant. Since Blake only nurses a few times a day and his main source of nutrition is not my milk anymore, nursing when we’re out now is a very rare occurrence.

Also, the toddler can be reasoned with a little. I just tell him that we’ll nurse when we get home or a little later. It’s also easier to distract him with other things if I need to.
But don’t you ever get tired and just want your whole self back? Sure I do. Nursing a toddler has its share of ups and downs. The twiddling he does and the grabbing at my shirt at inopportune times make it a challenge sometimes. But there are many blessings and joys, too.

He calls it by name now. “Nuss” is his word. Other children have their own special names for time with mommy. We have a ritual each time we nurse before nap and bedtime that I will remember forever and tell him about one day.

Sometimes he just wants to rest his little hand there because in many ways this is his security “blanket,” a place he knows he always feels warmth and love. It’s a place he’s known for a long time.
How do you know when he’ll finally give it up? Well, I don’t really. As I said before, the average age for self-weaning worldwide is 3 years. Some children wean before this and some wean after this.

Weaning should be viewed as a developmental milestone. Children reach their milestones at different times as each child is different. They don’t all sit up at the same time or walk at the same time, and they shouldn’t all be expected to wean at the same time either.

I know that Blake will give up nursing when he’s developmentally and emotionally ready, and I also know that that time will be here sooner than I think!

Help for moms of nursing toddlers: Book, “Mothering Your Nursing Toddler”
breastfeed-essentials.com/nursetoddler.html (check out all the link at the bottom of the page)

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Becky Flora-Waterman is a board certified lactation consultant in practice with Breastfeeding Essentials. E-mail her at breastfeed@yahoo.com